Damage ~ Tsuki's story

Timelessness. Drifting. The pain was over as soon as it had begun. White hot pain being switched to a sense of numbness. Like day breaking over the ridged hilltops of Starcliff. A Sudden change between night and day. But I was floating. The sensation of drifting slowly over the Ash Ocean, on a journey to nothingness. Dreaming? Had my brain sent my spiralling to the realms of sleep? But it was dark. It couldn't be a dream. And then Light. Bright white light. Like a flash. Then there was the cave. Blood splattered against the walls. The stench of death. And then myself. Icy blue eyes wide and slumped. A Bullet in the skull. Dead. I was dead.
For a fleeting moment, time seemed to slow, the darkest corner of the cave echoing with the sound of gunfire. And from the same corner came the light footfalls of Silverstorm, her pale ghostly figure trotting away in saddened silence. Her body was barely visible, a mass of blood and fur resting on the cold stone floor.
It was obvious to the youngster I was there, but she chose to ignore me, rejecting every sense I existed. But I was not of Moonriver. I would not join the souls of Moonriver warriors guarding the territory like watchful hawks. Protecting the clan as they always had, generation after generation.
But I was truly of no clan, and if that classed me as a loner, I had nothing to protect.
Would I be left to drift for eternity? Forgotten?
And then I saw her. Emotions sweeping over me like a curtain of mist. Wings of ever-burning fire. Brown pelt glistning with wet blood. I knew then, for the fiery anger that conquered the rest. I shouldn't have taken the bullet.
Brook, Child of the Phoenix had to die.

The next few days, I followed Brook everywhere, watching her eat, watching her drink - even watching her sleep. I found it somehow disturbing, watching the gentle rise and fall of her body. She often twitched in her sleep, mouth hanging open, letting out mumbles and low moans as she slept. Once of twice, I heard my name, calling to me, beaconing me. I wanted to hold her close, to take away all of the pain that had dominated the early years of her life. But everytime I moved to take her, the backlash of rejection hit me square in the chest. Right where the heart is - where the heart was, and although I could not physically feel the pain any longer, psychologically I could, the white hot searing pain of the fireball as it smashed into my chest. The fire that not only burned away half of my body, but half of my soul - and all the feelings of joy and love among it. I had loved her with all my heart, been there for her during her darkness. But it had not been enough, and she, in the moment of anger had taken away my ability to love again.
As I looked down at her slumbering body, I found my imaginary claws flexing, dreaming if the day she would join me for eternity. One night, I even raked those invisible thorns down her back, but nothing happened. Not even a shiver. To be honest, I was disappointed. I hadn't expected much, but I would have liked to see fear in those beautiful eyes once again.
The following morning, Brook travelled to the apricot orchard with Moonriver Clan. I didn't know the reason, and I did not care. Brook had taken control of the clan, and I did not trust her alone. But, I knew she would cause no harm back at our birthplace, Ash Peaks. The apricot orchard was knew to me, as it was to Brook, but I couldn't help pining for home. As I stood looking out on the horizon, at the volcano and beyond, a pup fell through me, and I cannot be certain, but the child shivered, turning her fluffy face towards my position. I realised instantly then that this was none other than Brook's own daughter, Kooneria. The child was pretty, I had to admit, and it made me think back to my own children - our children. I couldn't help the sadness that overwhelmed me then, wondering if the pair had survived alone. I had been in no fit state to look after them when Brook had finished with me, for the next few weeks of my life was hazy. I was half starved by the time I had recovered enough strength to walk, let alone hunt, and the pups had been gone.
It was Brook's familiar snarl that drew me back into the focus of the lives of the living, and when I pinpointed her, I knew instantly the cause of the snarl. Brook had one of the Moonriver pups in her grasp, firmly shaking it. The pup had a defiant face, but it was obvious to me that her green eyes were dulled with pain. I'd seen Brook this angry before, once and only once - on the night she left.
There was a flash, and everything happened at once. The poor pup was dropped from Brook's grasp, and something hit Brook hard. Whatever it was, I saw Brook's soul being torn apart from her body, and eagerly, like a greedy child, I waited for the moment I had wished for all my life, to stay with Brook forever.
And then she saw me, and I saw her. Our eyes of blue and green met, the colours of the earth uniting and in a bold flash of colour I saw the pains of her life. The love, hate and the broken past. I did not know if she saw the same of me, but I knew my pain would not pierce the cold of her heart.
We must have held the link for what felt like hours, and then, she was ripped away, with a dark smile, back into the world of the living.
I learned one thing the day Brook viewed the world through the eyes of death.
The damage had been done.
I slid away from the place of my origin with the smile of death.
Destiny was calling me.