Dusk Howl
-:Dusk Howl:-
The End is Near

The storms are brewing. The darkness is closing in. Time is collapsing. The end is near. In Dusk Isle's Darkest Hour, who will live, and who will die at the end of the world? With the originals dying off, an idiotic witch with plans of her own, and Daybreak next to go completely insane who will survive the End of Time?

Darkness. Is that in the mind? Show your darkness and then you may lose the battle. A single sprout of darkness may turn you against all you know.

And don't forget - The Nyxius Marru. A Curse. It seems to have sided with insanity. Over the years, it has visited many minds and many projections. Whos mind has it touched? And those been touched, will they turn by the darkness within?
Dusk Howl
-:Dusk Howl:-
The End is Near

The storms are brewing. The darkness is closing in. Time is collapsing. The end is near. In Dusk Isle's Darkest Hour, who will live, and who will die at the end of the world? With the originals dying off, an idiotic witch with plans of her own, and Daybreak next to go completely insane who will survive the End of Time?

Darkness. Is that in the mind? Show your darkness and then you may lose the battle. A single sprout of darkness may turn you against all you know.

And don't forget - The Nyxius Marru. A Curse. It seems to have sided with insanity. Over the years, it has visited many minds and many projections. Whos mind has it touched? And those been touched, will they turn by the darkness within?
Dusk Howl
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 Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline)

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Brook
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PostSubject: Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline)   Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline) EmptySun Aug 15, 2010 5:36 pm

Welcome to Alpha Spirit!

Text in this colour is unfinished, this colour is finished and needs no more revision, this text may clash and this colour needs revision

All chapters will be in quote boxes on this post.


Blurb wrote:
Demons are trapped by ancient laws, binding their spirits to their homes. But a wicked, resourceful leader named Quarran has invented a way to cheat destiny, and with the demons taking more and more of the Korran packs land, including their only source of water in the heat of summer, something has to be done. But Seth, the alpha, has sent Demetri's brothers and Betas, Ash and Kroff, on a wild adventure to the north, the pack is viciously under protected. Demerti's relationship with Kroff and Ash is getting worse, and with the pack split, who can get the pack organise in time for the invasion of the demon kind?


Prologue wrote:
Prologue
The story I am going to tell you start in a deep quarry, carved into the side of a mountain. Behind that, the impenetrable mist, where no wolf has gone before, marks a thick, white boundary to the world as wolves know it, sharp, impenetrable, and icy cold. This is the eastern edge also known as the Eastern Wall of the World, and to the west, the mighty sea, a black land that joins to the sky and stretches to the gods. The sea is always rough and violent, huge mountainous waves with huge white horses galloping, tearing all wolves who dare try to swim in the swell to their dooms. And to the far north, the mountains, where thick pelted white wolves live in fear of the few demons that still roam the land freely along the Demonic Lines. And to the south, you may ask? The desert stretches to the south, a plain of endless gold sand and thick, warm sunlight, no water to parch a dumb wolf’s thirst, but a little for a quick witted wolf’s.
It is the year of the Great Rise, 200 years since the humans died of a disease that claimed the race before it could be stopped. Now, Canines are the top species, the top dogs, literally. A small pack lives a few valleys from the eastern edge, in constant fear of the demon infested quarry. And in this quarry, the Night Leader of the demons, a vicious, almost dangerous leader named Quarran.
***
Quarran watched the moonlit side of his home, sadly seeing both Night and Day demons gather in utter confusion below. The thick sound of rushing water reminded him of how his plan came to fruition. The single plant that granted any wolf he wished freedom from this hellhole he called home. His loyal subjects. He returned his gaze to them.
They glowed in every colour of the spectrum, and another colour that no human had a name for. Time for action. If he succeeded at his goal, he would destroy the Day Leader once and for all.
Preparing himself, he shook his pelt and eyed the crowd once more, and then he roared for attention, an odd, grating sound. Quarran was old, and there was no other way to put it. But he was strong, and ready, and not willing to give his place as Night Leader just yet. He had big plans and he was going to overthrow the Day Leader and take his place as the only demon alpha ruling over the quarry.
“Humans ruled 200 years ago! All who lived in my time know that! But, when they destroyed our Demon Lines, they destroyed our only means of travel! But now, I have found a way to separate your soul bags from you!”
This brought an amazed murmur from the crowd. The soul bags did not allow anyone to leave the quarry unless by the Demon Lines, and all of them lay crumpled and unfixable. The soul bags were little silver-white bags with a few small items which contained a small section of the soul.
“Look! Look at Seth! He has no soul bag, and he is awake!”
Seth, a small, golden demon, padded from the shadows behind, crept to the edge of the rock, and then showed his chest to the crowd, which held no soul bag. The crowd gave a gasp. Under normal circumstances, a wolf with no soul bag in contact with his skin would fall asleep, the only way possible for demons to sleep, which is why some are nocturnal, so they can put a demons soul bag back onto him when it is time for him to awaken. Seth was not – in fact, he was more awake than all of them.
“Seth will now step out of the boundaries of the quarry!” Quarran yelped, racing down the ramp of rock cut by the humans. Seth followed. He was nervous, yes; there probably was no denying it. He continued to follow the unfamiliar leader; Seth was a day-demon and the only one to crack and give Quarran what he wanted.
Quarran had started meddling with magic several moons ago, when he found an unfamiliar plant growing in to the edge of the quarry, just inside the border, by the waterfall. He smiled as he remembered finding the odd, half battered plant. Clutching it in his teeth, he accidently stepped past the border – and nothing happened. He could only step a few metres out, but if he could concentrate the juice, he could, maybe, he could strengthen how far out he could step. After that, he formulated a potion, and succeeded. Later, Seth was forced to be the test subject.
His leaps were elegant and long, striding for perfection at every step. The crowd turned, watching them with sharp, glowing eyes, race down and leap onto the moon washed floor. Their paw pads slapped down noisily onto the solid rocky floor. The edge of the quarry was marked by a pulsing green line, intricate runes threaded around it.
Quarran placed a paw in the air over the boundary. As normal, he was blown backwards, slightly stunned and a thumping in his ears, but not hurt. Seth put his paw right through- and put it down - and continued until he was all the way through. He wagged his tail with sharp relief.
The crowded chattered, amazed.
“That was – dangerous, no?” A small, pink soul demon with long, flowing, dirty white fur padded out of the crowd, and the quarry fell silent at the open challenge. This could get really dangerous really fast. However, it seemed Quarran was in – something of a good mood. He laughed, and Seth joined him. The others stared at the confrontation like the demons had grown new heads.
“No, not dangerous at all, Serendia. Seth suggested it in the first place and had done many tests beforehand. He is a little brain box really.” Quarran lied smoothly. Seth nodded. “I can’t say much about it really, it was a little fun.”
Could this spell the end of the Wolven race?
The sensible money was on yes, it could, with help.

Word Count - 1033


Last edited by DarkeWolfie on Thu Aug 19, 2010 12:14 pm; edited 7 times in total
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PostSubject: Re: Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline)   Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline) EmptySun Aug 15, 2010 5:40 pm

Nice.
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PostSubject: Re: Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline)   Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline) EmptySun Aug 15, 2010 5:41 pm

I actully hate the word nice. Cause it could be said sarcastically. And any crit? (Wants to make the prologue 1,000 words and the chapters 1,500 words at least.)
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PostSubject: Re: Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline)   Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline) EmptySun Aug 15, 2010 5:44 pm

Ok, how about Completely epic win?

And my crit would be that you might want to check some grammer. For example-

The crowded chattered amazed.

It should be-

The crowded chattered, amazed.

Or-

The crowded chattered in amazed.
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PostSubject: Re: Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline)   Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline) EmptySun Aug 15, 2010 5:51 pm

O.O Complete mistake. Word is a failure. I RELY ON IT'S GENIUS AND IT BETRAYED ME!
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PostSubject: Re: Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline)   Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline) EmptySun Aug 15, 2010 5:55 pm

XD
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PostSubject: Re: Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline)   Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline) EmptySun Aug 15, 2010 5:58 pm

*Is hoping to fit at least 15 chapters in so she can enter the Chickenhouse publishers yearly comp*
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PostSubject: Re: Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline)   Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline) EmptySun Aug 15, 2010 6:00 pm

WE ALL BELIEVE IN YOU!
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PostSubject: Re: Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline)   Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline) EmptySun Aug 15, 2010 6:12 pm

THANKYOU.
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PostSubject: Re: Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline)   Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline) EmptyMon Aug 16, 2010 4:13 am

You might want to try and make the chapters about three pages, rather than relying on words. ;3 It tends to work better that way. Other than that, I like it ^^ It's a good story~

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PostSubject: Re: Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline)   Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline) EmptyMon Aug 16, 2010 5:42 am

Murasaki wrote:
You might want to try and make the chapters about three pages, rather than relying on words. ;3 It tends to work better that way. Other than that, I like it ^^ It's a good story~


Always do as short prologe and long chapters, drawn out if I have to
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PostSubject: Re: Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline)   Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline) EmptyThu Aug 19, 2010 12:09 pm

Prologue finished and colour coding added.
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PostSubject: Re: Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline)   Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline) EmptyThu Aug 19, 2010 4:11 pm

Seth and Serendia were Demonic's chars!
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PostSubject: Re: Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline)   Alpha Spirit (Film Storyline) EmptySat Mar 26, 2011 3:14 pm

This isn't been done anymore. *locks*
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